Tag: navy
member name: Army Man .
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February 13, 2007 07:52 AM EST --
Infantry:
Snake smells them, leaves area.
Airborne:
Lands on and kills the snake.
Armor:
Runs over snake, laughs, and looks for more snakes.
Aviation:
Has GPS coordinates to snake.
Can't find snake. . . .
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July 09, 2007 10:38 AM EDT --
I, Top Gun, in lieu of going to prison, swear to sign away 4 years of my life to the UNITED STATES NAVY, because I want to hang out with Marines without actually having to BE one of them, . . .
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September 14, 2007 12:59 PM EDT --
A sailor in the Navy who had been at sea for a long time was anxious to be reunited with his girlfriend, so he sent her the following message a few days before his ship was due back in port:
"I have . . .
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January 26, 2007 02:32 PM EST --
Even if you have seen this joke, make sure you read my comments at the bottom of the article.
Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid
a collision.
Canadians: . . .
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September 17, 2007 10:43 AM EDT --
An Army brat was boasting about his father to a Navy brat.
"My dad is an combat engineer. He can do everything. Do you know the Alps?"
"Yes," said the Navy brat.
"My dad built . . .
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April 27, 2007 06:59 PM EDT --
In an effort to ensure proper training and readiness among the military services, Congress has approved the following changes to basic principles of recruit training:
Haircuts
Marines: Heads will be . . .
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August 24, 2007 12:56 PM EDT --
During an Army Reserve unit's annual training, the battalion commander was upset that evening chow was late. He called the mess hall, and the mass sergeant explained that because their vehicle broke . . .
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July 17, 2007 08:15 AM EDT --
A Rhode Island blonde was feeling so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the Narragansett Bay off of the Jamestown Bridge.
She went up to the middle of the bridge and was . . .
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August 16, 2007 12:22 PM EDT --
A naval command instructor was indoctrinating his new naval command recruits.
He said, "You are all in the Navy now and in the US Navy we have our own language. For instance, in the Navy we don't . . .
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August 29, 2007 12:40 PM EDT --
It seems that after WW I, the war to end all wars, the US Govt. had a lot of surplus material that they had no use for. What to do with it was a problem, and it was finally decided to hold an auction and . . .
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October 01, 2007 10:26 PM EDT --
To appease the public, the U.S. Navy has decided to spend as much as $600,000 for landscaping and architectural modifications to obscure the fact that one its building complexes looks like a swastika . . .
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February 18, 2007 08:30 AM EST --
ADMIRAL
Leaps tall buildings with a single bound,
is more powerful than a locomotive,
is faster than a speeding bullet,
walks on water amid typhoons,
reviews policy with God.
CAPTAIN
Leaps short buildings . . .
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February 28, 2007 07:18 AM EST --
Young sailor, I've been in this Navy a long time and I believe this steath stuff is a bunch of crap. In fact, I think I see the fighter over the horizon now...
"Would the next . . .
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January 19, 2007 12:17 PM EST --
Associated Press Updated: 9:20 p.m. CT Nov 2, 2006
MINNEAPOLIS - A group of Minnesota National Guard soldiers in Iraq has made a comically misspelled sign mocking Sen. John Kerry's . . .
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September 08, 2008 08:08 AM EDT --
"Today, gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news," said our platoon sergeant during our morning lineup. "First, the good news. Private Tomkins will be setting the pace on our . . .
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May 05, 2008 06:09 PM EDT --
MARINES:
Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Essential
My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment, Sir!
My Ass Really Is Navy Equipment
Uncle Sams Misguided Children (USMC)
U Suckers Missed Christmas . . .
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July 09, 2008 02:40 PM EDT --
A cocky young civilian inspector stopped in front of the storage facility where The Old Gunny was briefing a detail of young Marines.
He interrupted The Old Gunny in mid-sentence, saying, "I . . .
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July 15, 2008 12:05 PM EDT --
A sergeant was passing the barracks after lights out, when he heard some voices from inside. He slammed open the door, and shouted: Listen, you guys! A few minutes ago, you all heard me say good night. . . .
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July 17, 2008 02:51 PM EDT --
Our son is in the Army, stationed in Georgia. He invited my husband and I for a visit.
After driving endlessly through unfamiliar streets in search of an entrance to Fort Stewart, my husband suddenly . . .
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September 17, 2008 11:18 AM EDT --
A soldier was often away on lengthy tours of duty, leaving his wife to manage five kids by herself.
While he was away, the kids used to sneak into their parents room to sleep. So before shipping . . .
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